Half of me is a hopeless romantic while the other half is a realist. I’ve never been in love, it scares me to think about love. It consumes me when I think about the future. People say I’m too deep and unfathomable, I’m like in a harlequinade and I switch masks every single time. I thought that indulging into the emotion I have felt during my high school days was going to make me feel alive but I felt the opposite. Everyone around me was so busy trying to find their own inspiration, trying to experience what it feels like to be in love whilst I was so busy trying to alter myself for someone who will never care. I got lost in the process of altering or undergoing in that metamorphosis. I really thought that letting every emotion fill my soul would let me find myself back, I was wrong because that’s when I started to taste the pain of fire. I have met a lot of people who got into a relationship, all I ever heard were the never-ending I love you and forever. Forever is just a word, nothing can last in this cruel world. If you will try to fit into my shoes you will realize that the pain of love outgrows the happiness of love. I am not trying to be pessimistic when it comes to love, all I want to prove is that there’s more to life than love, that’s what my father said. For me he’s right, not because he’s my father but I came to the realization that people really don’t need someone to make them complete, people fall into the idea of love and more often than not, they tend to forget the importance of it. People think that love is when you say those three words to someone, and saying all those mushy things but love is much deeper than those. Yes, I may not have experienced love but I know a lot of things about love; how it can make or break someone into pieces.
I thought I fell in love when someone told me those three words but I was wrong, I was only trying to feel something and I fell into the idea of love because of those things that I read in books and watched in movies. I realized that loving someone means accepting him/her completely, with cracks and flaws. Loving is thinking about that person’s happiness rather than your own. Loving is waiting for someone and hoping that he/she would come back even though you know it’s impossible. When you finally meet the love of your life, it’s up to you whether you would take a risk and fall or you would just bottle up your emotions and let that person go. The choice is yours.
I was a hopeless romantic but becoming a realist definitely changed my insight about love. A hopeless romantic is someone who believes in destiny or love at first sight, he/she believes that there’s someone out there destined for him/her. A realist is someone who sees that face and packs it with every other people in that place, but a hopeless romantic may be convinced that that person is his/her soulmate. We aren’t living in the year of Shakespeare, it’s 21st century, and you might as well try to think about what I am saying, there are cruel people out there, trusting someone can be perilous for you and you surely don’t want to end being the messed up and brokenhearted person, just trust few.